“How did it come to be like this?!”

I know I haven’t written in a long time.. I’ve just lost a lot of motivation in life.. but that’s not what this post is about.

At work today, I was thinking a lot. I know it sounds weird.. but do you really ever take time to just stop and think? It doesn’t have to be about anything, it can just be following your thoughts and memories… But.. that’s for another time.

There was an elderly couple at Target today, and they were using one of our motorized carts. The battery died and so I was told over the walkie to find another one. We didn’t have it so I had to get a wheelchair. The elderly man was trying to push his wife in this heavy motorized cart. It’s so heavy that even I have a hard time moving the thing. When we finally got them the wheelchair, I thought that it was the end of it.

I was wrong.

I went to make my final checks in my supply closet which happens to be right next to the bathrooms. Apparently the elderly woman had fallen while trying to get into the bathroom. Her husband tried to help her but he had fallen too. I saw his hand as he was leaning against the wall. His withered, wrinkled hand.. The blood vessels were almost black, and his knuckles were slightly bleeding from his fall. I talked to the front end manager and was given permission to help them out by pushing the wheelchair that the eldery woman was in so the elderly man didn’t have to.

Apparently, the elderly woman was changing her diaper; she wasn’t able to do it by herself and consequently made a mess in the bathroom. One of my co-workers that works in the clothing department went to help her as the assets protection person and I waited outside and helped as much as we could by diverting others and getting supplies. When she got out, she just wanted to get the one bottle of advil they had managed to get and go home.

I wheeled her over to Guest Services to ring up the bottle of advil. She was in tears, most likely from embarassment. As soon as she finished buying it, I wheeled her out towards her car while my co-worker helped her husband along. The things she told me.. I can’t remember the last time I was this sad. She told me about how they had no family or friends left… it was just the two of them. They were easily in their 70’s or even 80’s, and they looked it. Their skin draped from their bones with massive wrinkles and creases. Her husband’s eyes were cloudy and turning slightly yellow with a milkish texture…

The elderly woman was extremely upset but thankful that we were taking care of her. I was worried about them driving home. She told me about how her husband recently had a stroke. It looked like it too, the old man didn’t look like he had much life left in him. He didn’t remember where they parked but the woman did. It was really bad, this was right before closing at around 9:40PM and there weren’t many cars left in the parking lot. When we got closer to the car, the old woman was sobbing. They had no one, and their health was failing.

I will never forget the words she said as we got close to her car. She sobbed, “How did it come to be like this?!”  Those words pierced me whole, like a scorpion stinging a rabbit’s soft flesh. I can’t remember the last time I was shaken up this bad. It’s been a long time since i’ve felt strong emotions like that.

As we were walking back inside, my co-worker told me something the elderly lady said. She told me that the elderly woman had said she wanted to just go home, go to sleep and never wake up. That is one of the most depressing things i’ve ever heard. It made me wonder about how this country treats the elderly.

If I manage to live as long as they do, will someone take care of me? Will the way we view elderly people be different then? That’s assuming my frail body even makes it that long, which i’m not too sure about. It must be so hard, having everyone you’ve ever known, be it friends or family to all die before you and leave you alone when you need help the most. It’s certainly changed the way I look at life.